Q&A 10 + Weird Messages (January, 2015 – February, 2015)

Questions and answers (January, 2015 – February, 2015).

—CHAPTERS—
0:10 – Q&A
10:01 – Weird Messages

—QUESTIONS—
0:13 – What is your favorite color?
0:18 – What color are your eyes, and are you wearing contact lenses?
0:36 – Have you ever considered painting your nails?
0:42 – when you first started shaving your eyebrows did you ever make yourself jump
1:04 – does that necklace that you wear a lot have any specific meaning to you?
1:22 – do you like bondage?
1:42 – Do you know a lot about sexual energy???
2:25 – Do you believe in dream meanings?
2:48 – Have you ever experienced lucid dreams?
3:41 – what were some of your favorite cartoons?
5:26 – why don’t you like children?
5:43 – how did you manage to overcome the states of deep sadness and despair without medicine?
6:19 – Is it possible for the host to never come out?
6:43 – Do you get government money because of your mental illness???
7:02 – Does [not dating a trans person] make me a bad person?
7:26 – what did it feel like to transistion from male to female?
8:15 – So you have to take hormones for the rest of your life?
8:44 – How exactly does your vagina work as opposed to a female’s vagina?

Table of Contents

    Hi everyone, I thought I’d answer some more of your questions and read back weird messages. Be sure to check the description to go to specific questions if needed.


    Q&A

    Q: What is your favorite color?

    A: It is black of course.


    Q: What color are your eyes, and are you wearing contact lenses?

    A: My eyes are a blue / green color. They change. They also have central heterochromia that is a bit golden or brown. And no, I do not wear contact lenses and have no interest in wearing them.

    My Eye
    My Eye

    Q: Have you ever considered painting your nails?

    A: I use to. It’s been a long time though.


    Q: when you first started shaving your eyebrows did you ever make yourself jump when you saw yourself in the mirror in the morning?

    A: When I first did it, I was kinda disgusted and shocked at myself. I was like, “Eww, how am I going to draw them?” And after some time, I got the hang of drawing them and don’t have a problem now.


    Q: does that necklace that you wear a lot have any specific meaning to you? Or is it just your favourite

    A: I love this necklace. It certainly is one of my favorites. There is no specific meaning, I just like it.


    Q: do you like bondage?

    A: It’s not something I’ve ever done or have immediate interest in. Now, if I was with a partner and we wanted to try this, then I would be open to the idea. I like to experiment and adventure with various things so I certainly would be open minded to the idea.


    Q: Do you know a lot about sexual energy???

    A: As in how one can use sexual energy as spiritual energy to manifest and change their life? If so, then I am somewhat experienced in this. It is something that is intriguing that I would like to explore further. It’s one thing to utilize the energy yourself, but I think it’ll be a completely different, and much more powerful, experience with another person. I think sex in general with another person is a very spiritual experience. So, I would need it to be with a partner that I share a strong bond with before being able to utilize that sexual energy.


    Q: What do you dream about? Do you believe in dream meanings?

    A: I do believe in the meaning of dreams. Dreaming is very special to me as I’ve had many premonitions of future events and my dreams help forewarn me or notify me of what is going to happen. However, many of my dreams are weird. Like, super weird.


    Q: Have you ever experienced lucid dreams?

    A: I have to some degree. I’ve never been able to while I was already asleep and dreaming. Like, I’ve never been able to do it in the middle of sleeping and then realizing that I was asleep and could lucid dream. Rather, it will happen during specific moments. When I am about to fall asleep there can be some amount of lucidity. It’s not much though. But, the best times are actually when I wake up in the morning. I can close my eyes again and get very detailed visuals and control them. And the other time is actually before and especially after orgasm. I guess because my body and mind are clear and relaxed and there is already a lot of energy that makes for the lucid experience.


    Q: Growing up, what were some of your favorite cartoons?

    A: Well, I’ll discuss a lot of my favorite shows from back then not just specifically cartoons. But, I remember various ‘Looney Tunes’ shows, and ‘Tom and Jerry’ when I was really young. That was when I was very young. Then I got into ‘SpongeBob’ when I got older and I loved ‘Invader Zim’ and ‘Courage the Cowardly Dog,’ in addition to all the other Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network shows back then. I even really loved watching ‘The X-Files’ back then. Then I also remember watching an older show, ‘Three’s Company.’

    Then I remember looking through the TV guide, this was back when TV guides came printed in the newspaper. Oh gosh, that seems like forever ago. But anyway, I was looking through that and I remember seeing some shows on Cartoon Network late at night rated higher than they were for children. This was when I was ten or eleven. So, I would sneakily watch the shows late at night on Cartoon Network, which was called Adult Swim at night. And, I remember loving ‘Aqua Teen Hunger Force,’ as well as the other shows that came on the network at the time including some anime shows that I got into and began watching.

    This was also around the time that I got into watching Comedy Central. The three best shows I remember on that station back then were ‘Trigger Happy TV,’ ‘Crank Yankers,’ and ‘Reno 911!’ Gosh, I just loved all of that. I would even record practically everything on VHS tape.


    Q: why don’t you like children?

    A: Oh, I just…I just don’t. I just can’t stand the annonance, responsibility, taking up my time to raise the darn thing. Just no. Like no. Come on. We’re not doing that.


    Q: how did you manage to overcome the states of deep sadness and despair without medicine?

    A: I thought it was impossible to be honest. But, when I started learning about myself and the way I am, and addressed my past traumatic experiences, things slowly started to change for me as I learned, not only about myself, but also how to deal with my mood, anxiety, trauma. I learned it by being introspective and analyzing myself. And, I share that experience and my ways of overcoming it, and continuing to overcome it, in my YouTube videos.


    Q: Is it possible for the host to never come out? Is it possible that the host could essentially die and an alter take over forever?

    A: Yes, I (Autumn) actually thought the host did die at one point due to what was going on. But, she seemed to just have gone away and I wasn’t aware of her for some time, probably about a few weeks or so.


    Q: Do you get government money because of your mental illness???

    A: No, and I have no desire to receive money of that kind. I work very hard at what I do and am proud to be making a decent living and will continue to push through until I can make a full living for myself.


    Q: I’m not sure if I’d be able to date a transgender, it’s not that I’m against it, but I’m struggling with the thought that you were once a man. Does this make me a bad person?

    A: No, not at all. Many people are not open to the idea of dating a trans person. I certainly wouldn’t take any offense if someone didn’t want to be with me because I was trans because it’s simply their own view.


    Q: what did it feel like to transistion from male to female? i mean as reborn mature female and suddenly taking over a male’s life who may have been abused must have come with challenges or were you were completely accepting of the life and ready to forget and start over?

    A: Yes, it was like a brand new life. I started going out into the world with more confidence, looking at myself and seeing a beautiful woman instead of an ugly man in my eyes. It was the best feeling. As for the abuse, that will never go away, but I certainly felt I was more distant from it which has allowed me to take a look at it better, analyze it, and most importantly, talk about it and eventually overcome it.


    Q: So you have to take hormones for the rest of your life? Isn’t that bad for your health? What’s going to happen when you get old?

    A: Yes, hormones are taken for life. As you age, there will be more concern for blood clots specifically because of the estrogen. So, the methods may change. But, life expectancy may be lower due to hormones, surgery, or anything else. So, I guess the main thing then is, only time will tell.


    Q: I was wondering after the srs surgery you get to have a vagina can a male still put his penis in a male to female transgender person and have sexual intercourse. How exactly does your vagina work as opposed to a female’s vagina?

    A: Yes, sexual intercourse with a male to female trans person that has undergone SRS is possible. It’s usually different in that more lubrication may be needed. Also, depth may be an issue for some. Also, the difference between a natural female vagina and a surgically made one is quite a big one. Aesthetically it will look comparable. However, a trans person’s vagina will not have any reproductive organs. There is nothing inside. As a result, there is no way to reproduce, as in get pregnant, no menstrual cycle. Additionally, there is much less nerve endings so it’s far less sensitive, which can certainly pose a problem. What is similar, however, besides the appearance, is that you can still produce some amount of lubrication, at least I can. As well as get aroused and have an orgasm. And, that’s about the only similarities.


    Weird Messages

    Weird message time. The first is:
    WM: Do u get high when u r about to make videos

    A: So high…sooooo high.


    WM: Yep, she passes the crazy test. Look at those drawn-on eyebrows.


    WM: Are her eyebrows drawn on with sharpie, or were they animated on in the video?

    A: Does this clear up the confusion?


    WM: i think ur eyebrows made me schizo, because its very difficult to understand if they r real or fake


    WM: Tone down thy eye make-up please. I actually got like a jumpscare when I first opened the video ._.


    WM: wow this lady is so pale she looks like a zombie. how the hell did this get on my youtube? ick.


    WM: Social security should definitely cover make up expenses for people with multiple personality disorders.

    A: You know, I agree. Makeup can get quite expensive, especially with the different styles that my personalities like. It would be so wonderful if there was some sort of compensation and way of paying for my makeup disorder. It’s difficult when we run out of makeup. Don’t know what to do without makeup.


    WM: i see every one of your personalities likes to smack their lips. like damn, grab a drink

    A: Fair enough?!


    WM: I just wanted to watch videos of Miley Cyrus twerking. Idk how I got here or why I watched the whole video…


    WM: Something I see people faking a lot is being a different sex. Like you, you’re a dude.


    WM: I have to say my “trap vision” is top notch, I started watching the video and thought to myself immediately – “something is off, this looks kinda like a transgender man” and bam I scrolled down and it was confirmed, I feel much safer knowing I can do this with one look LOL!.


    WM: I have some channeling here.
    I hereby accuse you of:
    1. being a skeleton like creature with a mutilated penis
    2. having a skinny ass
    3. accusing me of NOT being superior
    4. pronouncing analytics as ANAL-lytics
    5. smiling like a lunatic all the time
    6.NOT being me, anyone who is not me is despicable.
    that is all i could conjure for now, i believe.


    WM: You irish freak!!!!!!!!!!!

    A: Uhh…I’m not Irish.


    WM: 29 minutes of fappable material

    A: It sure it. It sure is. I can give you more if you like.


    WM: She sounds like a deaf person sometimes.

    A: Does that…does that make any sense?


    WM: Just buy five snickers and eat them they might help ya

    A: As if!


    So, that’s all for now. Thanks for watching!

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    Notes

    My tenth Q&A and weird message video. This one literally features digitally applied eyebrows. It was hilarious doing that. All I did was draw two sloppy lines over my eyebrows and went “frame by frame” and moved them into position.