Hi everyone! In this video I will be discussing personality disorders. Personality disorders are a group of mental health disorders in which an individual has a long-term pattern of behaviors, emotions, and thoughts that generally develop early and are inflexible. In other words, they are characteristics that make up your personality and who you are. So, they can be very difficult to change. [Change Your Personality]
There are ten primary disorders, separated into three categories.
- Cluster A (odd) includes paranoid, schizoid, and schizotypal.
- Cluster B (dramatic) includes antisocial, borderline, histrionic, and narcissistic.
- Cluster C (anxious) includes avoidant, dependent, and obsessive-compulsive.
Not all of these apply to me, but I will be discussing all of them. Be sure to check the description to go to specific ones if needed.
Cluster A (Odd)
Cluster A (odd) personality disorders include paranoid, schizoid, and schizotypal. Common features include eccentricity, delusions, and social and emotional withdrawal. This is probably the category that defines me the best. All three of these very closely resemble schizophrenia as a whole. So, if you would like to know more about my struggle with schizophrenia, please watch the video I made on it. [Schizophrenia]
Paranoid personality disorder is characterized by paranoia, suspiciousness, and the mistrust of others.
- The individual may always be on guard, observing their surroundings for threats.
- Feeling as though they are in danger when there is no evidence to suggest this.
- They are hypersensitive to criticism.
- And, they can feel reluctant about revealing any personal information as they feel it will be used against them.
This personality disorder greatly applies to me. I am very paranoid and suspicious of other people and their actions. I often misjudge who they are and what their motives are. And, this is very much a struggle for me since I feel as though people are going to go behind my back and hurt me.
Schizoid personality disorder is characterized by apathy, living a solitary lifestyle, and lack of interest with social relationships.
- The individual may be more interested in their internal world versus the external world.
- They may prefer being alone and have few, if any, close friends.
- They may not know how to respond to social cues.
- They may come off as apathetic, expressing little to no emotion.
Again, this personality disorder very much applies to me. I prefer to be alone above all else. I dislike social situations and close relationships, and thus do not seek them out nor have many friends. I do not like when people try to be my friend because they think I need one. You don’t know just how many people have said this sort of thing to me, and I don’t respond to them. I don’t want a friendship with someone that feels bad for me and thinks I need a friend to talk to. Knowing that people care, without actually becoming close to them, like I am doing on here, is what I prefer.
Schizotypal personality disorder is characterized by eccentric thinking, behavior, or appearance.
- The individual may prefer social isolation and/or have difficulty maintaining close relationships and relating to people.
- Others may view the way they dress, speak, and/or act as peculiar/odd.
- They can have grandiose delusions, misinterpreting situations as being strange and having an unusual meaning for them.
- Often lives in a world of fantasy and daydreaming; having odd beliefs or magical thinking.
This personality disorder, again, very much applies to me. To me, my so-called ‘odd’ thinking and behavior is normal and reasonable. What defines ‘normal’ anyway? I tend to be very socially awkward. People look at how I act and can usually tell something is off. I live in a world of imagination, believing in mystical/magical things that many people do not because they think it is odd, unusual, or unlikely.
Cluster B (Dramatic)
Cluster B (dramatic) personality disorders include antisocial, borderline, histrionic, and narcissistic. Common features include dissociation, exaggeration, malingering, and denial and/or mendaciousness. I can relate to borderline in this category, and partially histrionic.
Antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a disregard for the rights of others, manipulative behavior, and lack of empathy. Often referred to as a sociopath.
- Individuals can be very irresponsible.
- Lying, stealing, drug and alcohol abuse is very common.
- They can have a history of crime, and impulsive and aggressive behavior.
- And, they have no remorse for their wrongdoings.
I cannot relate to this one at all. I am very empathetic and care about others. Maybe not so much on a personal basis due to my social isolation, but as a whole. People with antisocial personality disorder can be very difficult to treat as they will often not see what they are doing wrong and will blame others for their problems.
Borderline personality disorder is characterized by intense mood swings, problems with self-worth, unstable interpersonal relationships, and impulsive, self-destructive behavior.
- Individuals may alternate between the positive and negative of others and shift back and forth for little to no reason, making relationships difficult.
- They may have intense feelings of emptiness and loneliness.
- They can be paranoid and delusional.
- And, they can have intense fears of abandonment, or frantic fear of being abandoned. This fear may lead to frantic attempts to avoid being alone by making lots of friends or holding on to those around them, or reject others before they are abandoned.
It is interesting to note that a large number of people with dissociative identity disorder also fit the criteria for borderline personality disorder. Also, bipolar disorder should not be confused with borderline personality disorder. While there is some overlap, they are two different illnesses.
I can relate to this personality disorder. My feelings about someone can shift very quickly. It’s like, “Oh, I love you. No, I hate you, but I need you in my life because you mean a lot to me. No you don’t, go away.” And, this is so annoying. I don’t even know what I think many times. I tend to always feel empty and unfulfilled, and I don’t know why.
I also have a very intense fear of abandonment. Many years ago it was at the point where I would try to have many friends. Not personal or anything. I would just want to be friends with everyone on Facebook that I saw in school. When they didn’t accept my friend request I would freak out because I thought they hated me, even though they didn’t even know me. I would even freak out and become so depressed and cry when someone would remove me as a friend on Facebook. I kept a list of all my friends and when I saw the number drop I went through the list to find out who it was and it upset me so badly.
Now, my outlook has changed to where I cut the person out of my life before they get too close so I can avoid that abandonment altogether. That way I am not hurt. But, this leaves me with like no friends at all. When it comes to the Facebook thing, I block all the people I had as friends so they don’t threaten me any longer. It’s very frustrating.
Histrionic personality disorder is characterized by excessive need for approval, attention-seeking, and inappropriately seductive behavior.
- Individuals may have very intense and unstable emotions and distorted self-image.
- Uncomfortable unless the center of attention, and will overreact to become the center of attention.
- They are constantly seeking reassurance and approval from others.
- And, are often self-centered, seeming fake or shallow.
I will admit, there is a part of me that I would say is like this. There have been times that I feel as though I need to be the center of attention. I have done things that are shocking to get a reaction out of people, because I want them to talk to me. Even if it’s negative, I want the attention. I am also someone who is constantly in need of reassurance and approval from others.
Deep down though, all of this is not me, so it is very frustrating and confusing. However, I would say that this is mostly because I feel very unloved. I don’t feel like anyone accepts me. Even if they tell me they do, I need the reassurance.
Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by an abnormal love for oneself, feeling superior and important, and preoccupation with power and success. Often referred to as egotistical or arrogant.
- Individuals may be very insecure with low self-esteem and a distorted self-image.
- They cover it up by putting others down and thinking they are superior.
- They exaggerate their talents and achievements.
- And, they seek constant attention.
This does not apply to me at all. However, I believe we can all be conceited at times, but not to this severity. I think most of my self-centeredness and arrogance comes from my delusions. Thinking I am important in some way, that everyone knows about my amazing abilities and talents and wants them for themselves. Most of this is related to the grandiose delusions I have. I don’t, nor do people that really know me, consider my behavior to be narcissist. But, it’s a shame that other disorders can make one appear that way at times.
Cluster C (Anxious)
Cluster C (anxious) personality disorders include avoidant, dependent, and obsessive-compulsive. Common features include loneliness, fearfulness, and controlling and/or passive-aggressive behavior. I can relate to avoidant and obsessive-compulsive in this category.
Avoidant personality disorder is characterized by extreme social isolation, sensitivity to negative criticism and rejection, and feelings of inadequacy.
- Individuals may feel unwelcome or isolated in social situations.
- They have a very low threshold for criticism.
- And, perhaps an inferiority complex.
- They feel uncomfortable, anxious, and lonely.
This personality disorder very much applies to me. I try to avoid social situations at all cost. I am very hypersensitive to criticism, even constructive criticism, and have a very bad inferiority complex.
Going back to schizoid personality disorder, many times I prefer to be alone and not have any close relationships and it doesn’t bother me at all. But, there are many other times that I do wish to be close to someone since I get very lonely. That is the key difference between the two. Someone with schizoid personality disorder has no interest in relationships and closeness. While people with avoidant personality disorder may want relationships and closeness, but avoid it because they feel inferior and will be criticized. I experience both of these very often and it is very difficult to deal with.
Dependent personality disorder is characterized by emotional dependence on others.
- Individuals may have difficulty making their own decisions without consulting others.
- They can be very needy, clingy, and fear separation and being alone.
- They have intense fears of abandonment, and may jump right into a new relationship when one ends.
- They can display submissive behavior and tolerate abuse from others so they don’t feel alone.
I cannot really say this one applies to me. I do not really fear being alone, at least not so much any more. Though I think I can be very needy at times, but that’s because I do not want to lose those that are around me because I fear abandonment. Though I would never endure abuse from someone. If someone is abusing me in any way, then they need to get out of my life. I’m not going to keep them around.
Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder is characterized by perfectionism, orderliness, and inflexibility.
- Individuals may plan out all activities in advanced.
- They have anxiety about changing their rigid routine.
- May have very strict standards and not be willing to allow others to do tasks.
- And, can become emotionally withdrawn when unable to control a situation.
Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder should not be confused with obsessive-compulsive disorder. While they are similar, the key difference is that people with OCPD usually find pleasure in perfecting a task and feel like their behavior is rational and desirable. While those with OCD find their obsessions and habits to be unwanted, time-consuming, and stressful.
I would say I have both OCPD and OCD. I did make a video on OCD if you would like to check that out. [OCD] Anyway, I would say that I find some of my obsessions and compulsions to be fulfilling, such as perfecting a task. But, many times I find it distressing. They take up so much of my time that it’s frustrating. Even when it comes to perfectionism and having things orderly, I do enjoy the feeling of things being perfect in my eyes. There is a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment there. But, a lot of times this behavior is very unhealthy for me since I focus on the details and spend so much time at perfecting it that I lose sight of what it was supposed to be.
For example, when doing these videos, I study each and everything so carefully that it takes a lot of my time. When I upload it and then discover some trivial mistakes, I get really upset. I really want to delete the video, fix the mistakes, and reupload it. But, I would lose all views and comments and everything else. Though, I would feel a sense of accomplishment from doing this despite how much stress it causes me by wanting and needing to do this.
So, I hope this video was informative. Thanks for watching!